I might accidentally get good at making these if I keep making them even though they're bad.

“Kitty Karry-All Is Missing” may actually be the first iconic episode of The Brady Bunch. It originally aired on November 7, 1969 - which, incidentally, was Christopher Knight’s 12th birthday. It was the 7th episode to air, and the 4th episode produced. It was the last episode to air that was directed by John Rich. (The last one produced was “Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore.”) This was also the last full episode to air with the original Tiger, who died during production of “Katchoo.”

As an aside, while I was preparing for this episode, my notebook with all of my notes for the episode reviews and other Brady related things that I do research for completely disappeared. I still have not found it and I live in a small apartment. I think the ghost of Tiger is mad that I think he should have been written out of the show much earlier than he was and he took my notebook, which… I can’t even be mad at that. I got the Brady treatment. I have a lot of notes here about the influences this episode has had on pop culture, but I decided to save those for the end. Without further ado, let’s get into the episode.

It only takes a second for tragedy to strike, though.

The episode very sweetly starts with Cindy singing a lullaby to Kitty Karry-All in the family room. Carol listens in from the kitchen. Mike casually strolls out from Alice’s area and says bye to Carol. Carol has Mike look in on the adorableness and comments on how many bottles Cindy’s given her doll. Mike says to get more little diapers ready and oh my gosh this is The Brady Bunch’s first bathroom joke. Mike leaves the house through Alice’s area - how does this make sense? He’s in the kitchen. The glass door has a more direct path to his car. I’m confused. Anyway, Carol leaves the kitchen to clean the kids’ room. Wait, where is Alice?

Just a boy walking and tooting.

Bobby and Tiger enter the family room. Bobby is playing his kazoo. Cindy silences Bobby because she’s putting her baby to sleep. Tiger barks, so Cindy shushes him, too. Bobby, in frustration, says he wishes Kitty Karry-All would disappear. Gee, I wonder what direct set-up is happening here? Bobby leaves the room. Cindy sets Kitty down to get her a bottle, but when she returns, Kitty is gone.

"He wasn't even in the room but he definitely did it."

Cindy calls for Carol to explain that Kitty is missing. Bobby returns, playing his kazoo again, and Cindy wastes no time in saying he is responsible for the disappearance of her doll. Bobby defends himself, but honestly if Cindy thought about it for five seconds she’d know she was wrong. Cindy says that when she returned from the kitchen, both Kitty and Bobby were gone, but Bobby left the room before Cindy did. No wonder Susan Olsen thought Cindy was dim. Of course, if Cindy thought about it and she wasn’t prone to making dumb choices, we wouldn’t have a plot and this is an iconic episode.

That's the way they became the Bathroom Battle Bunch.

Upstairs in the boys’ room, Greg and Peter interrogate Bobby. Ultimately, they believe him. Meanwhile, in the girls’ room, Marcia and Jan are listening to Cindy’s version of things and they believe her. Even though they shouldn’t. Cindy is an unreliable witness. Anyway, the boys and the girls decide to confront each other. It all comes to a shouting match in the kids’ shared bathroom. Carol and Mike come to break it up. Once the kids are separated into their rooms, Mike says that he’s going to talk to the kids. However, when Carol says she tried that, he decides to search the house from top to bottom.

Communication. It's not just for people with your last name.

Alice finally appears in the episode, cooking in the kitchen. Mike enters and walks silently past her, to the fridge. Alice really deserves better. Alice breaks the silence to ask if he needs help, but he says no as he continues his search for Kitty in the freezer. Alice is adequately confused. Then Mike looks in the oven. Alice believes Mike to have heat stroke and he never, ever decides that he needs to clarify. Communication, Bradys. It’s your friend.

Alice is reconsidering not quitting.

Alice sees Carol tearing apart the couch in the living room and when Carol says, “You’ll never guess what I’m looking for,” Alice correctly guesses, “doll.” But we don’t see if Carol is a better communicator than Mike because we cut to the girls’ room, where Marcia has found her lost earring and Jan has found her skate key. Alice enters as the girls give up the search in their room to see it disheveled, and it’s obvious that no, Carol didn’t tell Alice what was happening. Cool. The woman only cooks you meals and does your laundry, there’s no reason to tell her anything.

Alice is going to demand that raise now.

In the boys’ room, Bobby ponders where a doll might go and Greg says, “To me, sweetheart.” Oh my gosh, he is his father’s son. Peter complains that Greg only thinks about girls and Greg tells Peter to keep looking. Alice enters as the boys leave to search another location, still bewildered. As the boys walk downstairs, they complain about wasting their day looking for the doll, but when Bobby says he’s glad it’s gone, his brothers suddenly take Cindy’s side.

Bobby has been voted out of the Brady Kids.

Later, Carol looks out at the yard and tells Mike to look with her. The other five Brady kids are shunning Bobby. Carol doesn’t think it’s fair. I don’t either. It’s so super obvious he didn’t do it. Mike intervenes and talks to Marcia and Greg, since they’re the oldest. Mike talks to the kids about the judicial system then leaves to go shopping with Carol. Maybe he does have heat stroke. Greg points out no one saw Bobby take the doll - you know, because he didn’t - and Marcia agrees Bobby should have a fair trial before quipping, “Then we’ll hang him.” Season 1 Marcia, I miss you most of all.

Welcome to Brady Court.

The kids ask Alice to be their judge, and she begrudgingly agrees. Marcia is the DA and Greg is the defense. Peter and Jan are the jury. Nobody’s going to notice that Tiger hasn’t been seen since the beginning of the episode? No? Because he’s an ineffectual plot device? Cool, carry on. When Cindy takes the stand, she sticks to her story that Bobby took the doll because no one else was there. What in the fucking fuck Cindy. That’s not evidence. When Bobby takes the stand he insists he didn’t take Cindy’s doll because he wouldn’t do that to his sister. The jury is hung and does not reach a verdict, as Jan votes that Bobby is not guilty, but Peter votes that he is. During this whole fiasco, Alice manages to burn dinner.

The Brady adults are about to learn they can't even go shopping without the family dynamic changing.

A little later, in the yard, Greg and Bobby play catch. Mike and Carol return from shopping and see them playing. Greg asks Mike to play catch because Bobby doesn’t throw hard enough. Mike says to ask Peter but Greg shoots this idea down. Meanwhile, Marcia comes outside and asks Carol to tell Jan to return Marcia’s curlers. Carol asks Marcia to ask Jan herself, but Marcia refuses.

Even though she'll let her innocent brother hang, Cindy is sweet sometimes.

Later, in Mike’s den, Carol apologizes about dinner. Why?! You weren’t even home when it got burned. Carol and Mike then talk about the kids’ trial. Ultimately, they feel bad about Cindy and check in on her. Cindy says her prayers and asks for her entire family to be blessed, as well as Kitty Karry-All. Fun fact, I’ve been calling the doll by her name because I know it. I’m an avid fan of the show. But it wasn’t until this moment, about 15 minutes and 38 seconds in, that they ever said the doll’s name. She was just Cindy’s baby or the doll up to this point. After Cindy says her prayers and gets into bed, Mike and Carol kiss her goodnight and leave.

Cindy gives zero fucks about this elephant from "Africa."

On another day, Bobby enters the family room while playing his kazoo. Cindy is lounging in the room when he enters. He sees a new elephant toy that Carol got for Cindy, but she’s disinterested in it. Bobby likes, though. Tiger makes another appearance and there’s nothing suspicious about that, considering the only other time we saw him this episode Kitty disappeared. Bobby compliments the elephant toy but Cindy doesn’t think it holds a light to her doll. She again accuses Bobby of taking Kitty Karry-All. Cindy leaves the room in frustration. Bobby decides to play music for the elephant on his kazoo, but it’s gone. He blames Cindy. Oh my gosh how dumb are the Brady children. At what point, Bobby, was Cindy ever on the same side of the room as your kazoo?

Mike's real tired of these kids not understanding what evidence is.

Mike intervenes and says the kazoo could be in Bobby’s pocket, but Bobby empties his pockets and it’s not there. A lot of impossible things are, though. From which home did the young Robert Brady acquire a metal 5?! It’s the kind that one would find on either a mailbox or the side of a house. Mike explains to the kids that he believes them when they say the didn’t take each other’s things. Mike then talks to the kids about circumstantial evidence like they’re not younger than 10. Bobby and Cindy say they believe each other, but Cindy doesn’t actually mean it and she leaves the room. Carol enters the room and says she searched the house again but “no doll, no kazoo.” Um, did Carol take the kazoo? Or is she a witch? Because it definitely just disappeared a few moments ago and not when Carol started searching the entire house. Bobby realizes Cindy loves Kitty more than he loves his kazoo.

Bobby wants to be a good big brother.

Bobby uses his own money to buy the last Kitty Karry-All in the store. He only has three cents left over after the purchase. Cindy, the ingrate, does not like the doll. She runs off. While Carol and Mike discuss the situation, Tiger takes Fake Kitty. Carol and Mike witness this and chase after him. Ultimately, Mike finds the missing items in Tiger’s doghouse. Mike lectures Tiger, but Carol reminds Mike that Tiger needs a fair trial. Wow, Carol. Way to poke fun at Mike’s attempts at parenting while suffering a heat stroke. He tried, Carol. He tried.

Mike is upset that something terrible has allegedly happened to his golf club.

In the tag, Mike says he doesn’t understand how kids get attached to inanimate objects. Carol tells Mike that his lucky golf club is missing. When Mike becomes upset at the news, Carol reveals the club is safe and sound. Mike learns his lesson.

In an alternate take, it was red-head sister Phoebe who took Cindy's doll.

That’s it for this episode! Even when Tiger is a big part of it - he’s not. What’s the point of having a dog on the show if the dog is never on the show? However, I did say a couple of times that this might be the first iconic episode of The Brady Bunch, and it’s definitely left its mark on pop culture. The most obvious is this is one of the episodes Phoebe Brady was edited into, where she was the one to take Kitty Karry-All.

Wanda Maximoff gets it.

However, anybody who knows anything about Marvel series WandaVision knows The Brady Bunch inspired parts of the 70s episode “Now In Color,” and that episode does in fact have a Kitty Karry-All. Vision practices changing diapers on her - wonder if she’d consumed as many little bottles as Cindy had fed her own. This episode is also actually featured in WandaVision, as this is the episode of The Brady Bunch that Wanda watches in the Hydra compound after being exposed to the mind stone in “Previously On.” Over 50 years after the episode first aired, it’s still influencing modern television.

Even though I don’t think Tiger was ever a necessary part of the show, I do like “Kitty Karry-All Is Missing.” It’s one of the must watch Brady Bunch episodes, and even though the family is all suffering from varying forms of insanity this episode, it’s one that you are almost obligated to include in any Brady marathon. It’s not a highly rated episode on IMDB, but it’s truly one of the better Cindy episodes. In fact, it just edges out above “Eenie, Meenie, Mommy, Daddy” to not be the worst rated episode of the season. Also, none of the season 1 episodes rate as low as some season 4 and 5 episodes. They don’t even come close. There is another fun fact about this episode, which is the Kitty Karry-Alls in this episode eventually wound up in the possession of actresses Susan Olsen and Eve Plumb.

What do you think of the episode “Kitty Karry-All Is Missing?” Do you wish another episode had been featured on WandaVision? Let me know! I will be back next week to review the episode “A-Camping We Will Go.”